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10 tips for effective communication with dominant partners

10 tips for effective communication with dominant partners

by Dominik Etzl | Jul 20, 2023 | Best Practice, Leadership Tips, learning effectiveness | 0 comments

Homer Simpson has been delighting young and old for many years.

Irascible to slightly choleric, he says straightforwardly what he thinks, is constantly annoyed by trivialities, and doesn’t give much thought to the opinions and advice of others.

If you meet such a communication partner in your professional life, your enthusiasm will be limited.

But we say: You can also communicate effectively with Homer Simpson. Why don’t you try our tips right now?

The DiSG communication model

The DiSG communication model states that people communicate according to four different patterns – depending on their type: steady, proactive, conscientious, or dominant.

Even though the person sitting across from you always poses the greatest challenge – dominant partners usually remain particularly unpleasant in our minds. Why is that?

Dominant interlocutors

  • speak straightforwardly and want to get to the heart of the matter quickly without a lot of talking – this is easily perceived as impolite
  • are direct and very honest – which is sometimes perceived as too honest!
  • focus on solutions, not on problems – they usually don’t want to talk about them for long either

and yes, the one about being quick-tempered… that’s also there from time to time 😉

Homer Simpson is the epitome of the dominant communication type.

But you can communicate effectively with him, too. So in the coming week, find your personal Homer Simpson and try to have a goal-oriented conversation at eye level.

10 tips for effective communication with dominant interlocutors

DO’s

  1. focus on results and solutions.
  2. get to the point quickly and avoid long introductions and chit-chat.
    3. show self-confidence
    4. Be prepared to be blunt and (brutally) honest.
    5. Do not overreact to statements.
    6. show respect.
    7. Look the other person in the eye and speak in a firm, clear voice.

DONT’s

8.   do not digress from the topic!
9.   do not challenge the other person – you will lose!
10. don’t make promises you can’t keep.

And after the interview, we’re eager to read how you did.

Dominik Etzl

Dominik Etzl

Trainer & Solution Development Manager MDI & Manager Metaforum International.

​Dominik Etzl is Solution Development Manager and Trainer at MDI Management Development GmbH and Managing Director of Metaforum International. His focus is on topics of digital transformation, as well as OKR (Objectives & Key Results), agile leadership and lateral leadership. His goal is to support managers in leading a valuable contribution to their environment: on an individual, corporate and societal level.

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What is Sustainable Individualization in Leadership?

What is Sustainable Individualization in Leadership?

by Iris Burner | Jun 28, 2023 | Digital Transformation, Leadership Impact, Leadership in the digital transformation | 0 comments

Sustainable individualization in leadership – pious hope or real alternative?

In line with the last blog post on our MDI website “Inner Development Goals For a Better Leadership World“, this time we dedicate ourselves to the megatrend topic of individualization and the connection with the Inner Development Goals (IDGs) towards sustainable leadership.

Individualization instead of multi-module programs

The status quo often shows that companies rely on multi-module programs to develop and train their executives. Depending on the target group, these programs provide a broad general basis of tools and methods – a so-called “toolbox” from which the appropriate tool can be selected according to the situation.

In times of ever scarcer resources (keywords: time and knowledge, cost efficiency and environment) and living realities in climate change, however, one topic is increasingly coming to the fore in the education and training of our future shapers of tomorrow: individualization.

Individualization – one of the 12 megatrends

Individualization was presented by the Zukunftsinstitut 2023 as one of the 12 megatrends. These megatrends are the central trends of our time. They are the biggest drivers of change in business and society and shape our future – not just in the short term, but in the medium to long term. Megatrends unfold their dynamics over decades.

IDGs & SDGs 2030

This time horizon may seem long, especially considering the Inner Development Goals (IDGs), which are based on the implementation of the Sustainable Development Goals for 2030. This deadline means that the implementation of this megatrend can no longer be delayed. 

But when we think of Sustainable Development Goals, can we give individualization any room at all? Doesn’t individualization always consume considerably more resources than a collective measure? 

Megatrend-Map

Quelle: Zukunftsinstitut.de 

Sustainability vs. Individualization – Dealbreaker or Complement?

Sustainability and individualization have an interesting interaction with IDGs. On the one hand, individualization can be seen as a potential challenge to sustainability, as it may require more resources and lead to fragmentation of actions. If individualized programs are developed for each leader or individual, this can add time and cost and may be inefficient.

On the other hand, individualization also offers opportunities for sustainability. By enabling people to consider their interests, strengths, and needs, tailored development and education can take place. When leaders are supported in their development processes and have the opportunity to leverage their strengths, they can develop more effective leadership approaches that are also aligned with sustainability goals.

Promoting Individual Strengths and Creating Sustainability for Leaders and Organizations

IDGs are leveraging the megatrend of individualization to promote personal development and inner growth. By focusing on individual needs and goals, they enable people to realize their full potential and shape their own growth. This also includes the development of leadership competencies required for the sustainable transformation of organizations and societies.

Sustainable individualization in leadership thus means reconciling individual development and sustainability goals. This requires careful planning and design of educational activities to address both individual needs and sustainability issues. It is about fostering individual strengths while creating a common foundation for sustainable leadership.

Transfer to practice – 3 concrete approaches

What concrete measures can companies now take to initiate a sustainable and individualized leadership era?

1. IDG potential analysis

As a possible tool, the IDG potential analysis, for example, can provide an initial basic assessment. The basis of this analysis is a questionnaire based on the five IDGs (Being, Thinking, Relating, Collaborating, and Acting). By evaluating the analysis, the leader receives a self-assessment and finds out where they stand on the company values.

 

The results of the analysis serve as a basis for targeted measures to promote personal and professional growth in line with the IDGs and are particularly suitable for organizational and personnel development, leadership, team development, and change processes.

generational management

2. Team workshops with team profiles

In order to validate the self-assessment, there is also the possibility to get an external assessment from a colleague. Based on this, there is the possibility to conduct team workshops with team profiles to strengthen cooperation regarding the IDGs.

3. Mentoring program

Another way to put these findings into practice is to implement a mentoring program. This program supports leaders in realizing their individual goals and needs and integrating sustainability-oriented approaches into their leadership practice.

Executives are paired individually with an experienced mentor to foster their personal development and leadership skills. Thus, individual leaders’ needs and goals are addressed by assigning them a mentor who has experience and expertise in the specific areas the leader wants to work on.

The mentoring relationship allows executives to identify their individual strengths and weaknesses and work on them specifically. At the same time, the mentor and mentee are in a two-way exchange on a variety of topics, allowing them to learn from and with each other. This helps the leaders to integrate sustainability-oriented approaches into their leadership practice and to drive positive change in their organizations.

Conclusion

Ultimately, IDGs and customization can help create a new generation of leaders who are both personally fulfilled and focused on sustainable change. By addressing the individual needs and potential of each individual, IDGs can pave the way for sustainable and individualized leadership that can have a positive impact on organizations, society, and the environment.

Commitment MDI – We support leaders who strive for a better world

As an official partner of the Inner Development Goals (IDG), we are actively engaged in collaborating with other stakeholders, organizations, and individuals to advance the integration of transformational sustainable development skills into our leadership development. Our goal is to facilitate dialogue, knowledge sharing, and collaboration to advance the SDGs agenda.

Iris Burner

Iris Burner

Learning & Development Consultant

Since 2022, Iris has been an L&D Consultant at MDI, supporting leaders and organisations worldwide in personal development and creating tailored training programs. She values the personal learning experience and ensures clients benefit from valuable insights. With a background in adult education and professional experience in a renowned corporation, Iris has a comprehensive understanding of company needs and develops customized solutions for sustainable development and growth.

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How to Become a Compassionate Leader – 3 tools

How to Become a Compassionate Leader – 3 tools

by Gunther FĂŒrstberger | Apr 18, 2023 | International leadership development, Leadership in the digital transformation, MDI Inside, Training Insights | 0 comments

How to Become a Compassionate Leader in 3 Steps

At MDI, we not only develop others, but also ourselves. That’s why our CEO Gunther FĂŒrstberger attended a three-day seminar by systems researcher Peter Senge in Stockholm, where he gained some insights. He reports on his experiences in this blog post.

The Compassionate Leadership Masterclass

Peter Senge wrote a classic of leadership literature in 1990 with “The 5th Discipline”. When I read that he was giving a 3-day seminar in Stockholm as part of the Inner Development Goals Initiative, I knew I had to experience it. I thought about Marcus Aurelius who already said “You have to know the great ones of your time”.

The sold out Compassionate Systems Leadership Masterclass by Peter Senge and Gustav Böll took place in the artistic setting of Fotografiska Museum with about 100 participants from March 29 to 31, 2023.

The seminar title sounds a bit complicated. What is Compassionate Systems Leadership all about? A first key to understanding is the organizer: the Inner Development Initiative. In 2016, UN member states adopted the 2030 Agenda for Sustainable Development. Since then, our planet has continued to deteriorate.

A new leadership system for a better planet

Us earthlings have obviously not yet developed the skills and attitude it takes to undo the damage of the industrial age.

This is where the Inner Development Initiative comes in: The change in attitude must begin with the individual. Engaging broadly and deeply with the Inner Development Goals in the 5 categories of Being, Thinking, Relating, Collaborating, and Acting will help achieve the UN Sustainable Development Goals.

Our planet now needs a different kind of leadership than we know from the industrial age. It starts with feeling nature and other people and should lead to some sense of connection with others or even all beings on the planet.

Hardly anyone wants to intentionally cause grievances, but who is really aware of the effects of their own actions? System thinking can help to understand both short- and long-term impacts and interactions a little better.

New findings on two levels

Learning for me has taken place on two levels during these days. On the one hand, I got to know new tools or deepened known tools. On the other hand, the trainers were an inspiration in their handling of the group and their use of methods.

From the numerous thinking tools I pick out the three that I found particularly typical for Compassionate Systems Leadership.

Tool 1

First, as an overview tool, there is the three-legged chair (see figure 1). The legs represent aspiration, reflective conversations, and systems awareness. If one leg is missing, the stool falls over.

Without a creative imagining of a better environment, there is no improvement. Without reflection or a deeper understanding of systems, we quickly end up in dead ends despite having good intentions. 

Three-legged chair

Tool 2

The ladder of connectedness

The second tool is the “ladder of connectedness” (see figure 2), which confused me initially: From bottom to top, the ladder levels are called “agape, neutral presence, altruism, cognitive empathy, in-group empathy, empathic stress, and emotional distance.”

We can harness gravity to move toward deeper connectedness, i.e., strive more toward the lower levels. Confusion can be a sign of real learning. I could not easily assign this idea to an already stored concept. It seemed to fit most closely with a Buddhist understanding.

We may not achieve agape, all-connected love, but we can create a neutral presence even in difficult situations. It also needs the higher levels: A surgeon should manage to distance themselves emotionally for self-protection.

Neutral instead of empathetic

Distance also helps sometimes in conflicts that go round in circles. Empathic stress is something I can relate to as a father of younger children. When my 8-year-old and my 6-year-old argue loudly with each other, it seems easier for me to demand that they stop for the short term because it helps me reduce my internal tension. But in the long run, it doesn’t help me.

In-group empathy may lead to good cooperation in the team, in the company or even in one’s own country, but at the same time it may exclude those who do not belong to the group. I take it upon myself to practice more neutral presence, which is enduring tension and contradiction.

Ladder of Connectedness

Tool 3

Creative Tension

Now our third and a simpler tool (see figure 3): The principle of creative tension. I already knew that a vision needs the right level of challenge, because something we have already achieved or something we can never achieve is not good as a vision.

I found the continuation of the thought interesting: We can imagine the tension between reality and vision as a rubber band. When that tension becomes too uncomfortable for us, we often tend to either lower our aspirations or not tell the whole truth about the current state.

An energy source for change

A good example are an organization’s sustainability goals. When we consciously seek and hold this tension, we tap into the energy source for change. This principle of creativity is also found in theater as drama, in music as tonus, and in the Greek rhetoric. In this respect, it is not a new idea, but it is effective when we strive for change.

I was also interested in what Peter Senge is like as a person. I have already met some of the “greats of the lecture scene” away from the stage and with some of them I had the impression that it was difficult for them to live the conveyed messages themselves. That is also human.

Peter with rubber band

Peter Senge as a Human

In the morning of Day three, there was an emotionally expressed resistance from a participant who questioned the usefulness of the whole seminar. She said Peter Senge held on to the statement that we always have a choice and do not have to be influenced by external circumstances, despite her doubts expressed the day before.

Now I was curious. Will he maybe feel attacked and defend himself or let it stand as an individual opinion? He did not react immediately, but let other participants speak first. Later, he resonated, apologized, thanked for the learning opportunity, and did so with an authenticity and elegance that really impressed me.

He always treated his much younger co-trainer at eye level and was so moved several times that tears came to his eyes.

My summary

In the spirit of Marcus Aurelius, I had the opportunity to meet two greats of our time. Especially the combination of two trainers from different generations fits the challenges of our time.

Even though I have not implemented all of the presented contexts and tools and I am also not sure whether the term Compassionate System Leadership will become widely accepted, I recommend every leader to deal with the basic idea. A more sustainable leadership culture would do us and the planet good.

Mag. Gunther FĂŒrstberger

Mag. Gunther FĂŒrstberger

CEO | MDI Management Development International

Gunther FĂŒrstberger is a management trainer, author and CEO of MDI – a global consulting company providing solutions for leadership development. His main interest is to make the world a better place through sustainable leadership. He has worked for clients including ABB, Abbvie, Boehringer Ingelheim, DHL, Google, Hornbach, PWC and Swarovski. His core competence is leadership in digital transformation. At the age of 20 he already started working as a trainer and he also served as HR manager in international corporations.

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