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AI Hears; Humans Listen: Become a Master of Attunement

AI Hears; Humans Listen: Become a Master of Attunement

by Hamza Khan | Apr 18, 2025 | Digital Transformation, Leadership and AI, Leadership in the digital transformation | 0 comments

AI Hears; Humans Listen: Become a Master of Attunement

Prefer to listen to the article? Click below to access our AI speech-generated audio. However, if you want to read it as usual, keep scrolling.

AI Hears; Humans Listen: Become a Master of Attunement

Not Black Mirror. Not Severance. The reality we’re in is starting to feel a lot more like Her.

According to eye-opening research published in Harvard Business Review, the most common use of generative AI isn’t writing code, synthesizing data, or even creating content.

It’s companionship.

Let that sink in. At the frontier of one of the most advanced technological revolutions in history, people aren’t just looking for answers or performance enhancements—they’re looking to feel heard.

The Burnout I Didn’t Catch

At this year’s Leadership Horizon, my partner Bailey Parnell and I are set to announce the groundbreaking AI product we’re building at SkillsCamp. It’s the fastest-moving venture I’ve ever been a part of. 

In my previous companies, we’d maybe pivot once or twice a year. Now we’re pivoting multiple times a day. Strategies shift at breakfast. Features change by lunch. Priorities rearrange by dinner.

It’s exhilarating. It’s also exhausting.

In the middle of this whirlwind, we missed something important—one of our teammates was struggling to keep up. The constant change had become disorienting. They were slipping into the early stages of burnout. And here’s the part that really hit me:

I wrote the book on beating burnout.

The Burnout Gamble is explicitly about how leaders can prevent precisely this kind of thing. On top of that, during my keynote speech at Leadership Horizon a few years back, I preached the gospel of human-centered leadership—of slowing down to tune in. Of attunement.

Even though I had been hearing my colleague, the truth is, I hadn’t been listening.

I had only been reacting. Optimizing. Building the future of leadership. But not asking, in the way that only a human can:

“Kaif al hal?” (كيف الحال؟)

It’s Arabic for “How are you?”—but it literally translates to: How is your heart doing? AI can’t ask that. At least not yet. And even when it can, it won’t mean it.

Everything’s Amazing. Nobody’s Happy.

Over the past year, we’ve seen an explosion in AI capabilities. From Claude and DeepSeek to custom GPTs, agents, copilots, and beyond—we’ve unlocked tools that can write like us, talk like us, and think faster than us. And yet amid all this brilliance, morale is shaky. Anxiety is rising. Relationships at work feel more fragile. Loneliness is still trending. 

Somehow, despite everything being amazing…nobody seems to be fully happy. And that’s because the problem isn’t just about what’s being built. It’s about what’s being missed.

Become a Master of Attunement

Stephen Covey once said:

“The biggest communication problem is that we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.”

These days, we don’t even reply—we prompt. We’ve become so good at asking AI the right questions, we’ve forgotten how to ask each other the real ones.

So here’s an idea: Let AI be your productivity engine. Your logic brain. Your pattern-detecting genius. But let you be the soul. The resonator. The attuner. The etymology of attunement is “to bring into harmony.” It’s not about fixing people—it’s about feeling with them.

Become a Master of Attunement

In leadership, this means mastering what I call the Listening Ladder:

Emotion

Response Style

Example

Pity

Recognize

“That’s awful. At least it’s almost Friday.”

Sympathy

Care

“I’m sorry to hear that. That sounds tough.”

Empathy

Feel

“I hear you—it sounds like this workload is really taking a toll.”

Compassion

Act

“Let’s find a way to ease your load together.”

Attunement isn’t passive. It’s an active presence. It’s emotionally intelligent alignment. It’s not just knowing what someone is going through—it’s standing with them in it, and saying: I’m here.

But Isn’t AI Getting Good at This?

Sure, AI can detect emotional cues through text or tone. It can simulate concern. It can even give decent advice. But there’s a line it can’t cross: It doesn’t feel.

AI won’t sit in silence with a teammate who just got a life-changing diagnosis. It doesn’t notice how someone’s voice slightly trembles when they mumble “I’m fine.” Machines can’t experience shame, grief, awe, or love.

And it can’t ask, from the heart: How is your heart doing?

So yes, AI may one day outpace us in logic, language, and even innovation. But the sacred skill of soul-to-soul listening—that remains deeply, beautifully human.

The Future of Leadership

Ray Kurzweil prophesied that the 21st century won’t bring 100 years of progress—it will bring the equivalent of 20,000.

But no matter how far we go, one truth stays constant: People don’t quit companies. They quit leaders who don’t listen.

As the future of work accelerates, the leaders who thrive won’t be the ones who outpace AI. They’ll be the ones who partner with AI—and lead like humans.

Consider this your invitation to become irreplaceable. Learn to attune. Ask real questions. Listen with your whole body. Respond with presence. And the next time someone on your team seems off, don’t just check their output.

Check their heart.

Hamza Khan

Hamza Khan

Keynote Speaker

Hamza Khan is a best-selling author, award-winning entrepreneur, and globally-renowned keynote speaker whose TEDx talk “Stop Managing, Start Leading” has been viewed over two million times.

The world’s leading organizations trust him to enhance modern leadership, inspire purposeful productivity, nurture lasting resilience, and navigate constant change.

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Leadership Between Connectedness and AI – A Conversation with Hamza Khan

Leadership Between Connectedness and AI – A Conversation with Hamza Khan

by Hamza Khan | Sep 29, 2023 | Digital Transformation, Impuls series, Leadership and AI | 0 comments

Leadership between Connectedness and AI – A Conversation With Hamza Khan

Prefer to listen to the article? Click below to access our AI speech-generated audio. However, if you want to read it as usual, keep scrolling.

Leadership between Connectedness and AI – A Conversation With Hamza Khan

For another part of our expert series “Leadership 4.0: Leadership in the AI Era,” Leadership Horizon 2023 keynote speaker Hamza Khan agreed to an interview with us. He tells us about the skills needed in the age of artificial intelligence, recommends active action steps for leaders, and explains why, in his opinion, a pure leadership culture through robots is unrealistic.

Read this interview to gain insights and explore how artificial intelligence changes today’s leadership culture.

In the context of artificial intelligence, some people often worry about their jobs being replaced by AI. How do you see this concern? Especially, what then becomes the role of a leader when using AI?

The concern about AI replacing jobs is both valid and urgent. Undoubtedly, jobs will be changed and replaced by the end of the decade. These sentiments are shared by nearly every think tank and strategy consulting firm. For instance, Deloitte estimates that 100 million global low-wage workers must find a different occupation by 2030. McKinsey reckons that 400 million to 800 million individuals could be displaced by 2030.

But viewing AI as a tool that can augment human capabilities rather than replace them entirely is essential. Through this lens, leaders play a crucial role in shaping the narrative by ensuring that AI enhances employees’ skills and productivity.

The role of a leader in the AI era is evolving to that of a steward—one that must balance the dichotomy of leadership (serving the needs of the mission vs. serving the needs of the people). And I believe that what’s good for the mission is what’s good for people and, by extension, the planet.

To that end, leaders should focus on leveraging AI to automate routine and especially mundane tasks, freeing up time for strategic thinking, creative thinking, and fostering a culture of continuous learning and adaptability among their teams.

AI can be a game-change force multiplier for good. But suppose leaders repeat the mistake of using it as a tool to merely increase profitability at the expense of people and the planet. In that case, we risk accelerating civilization toward the opposite of the greater good.

Are jobs being replaced by AI?

For what purposes do you think AI can be best utilized in a professional context?

AI is exceptionally valuable for data analysis, decision-making, and process optimization. My rule of thumb for optimally using AI is to give it that which is measurable, repeatable, and scalable.

My tasks offload to AI include increasingly complex coding, extracting insights from vast datasets, written (and soon multimedia) content editing, improving forecasting accuracy, and enhancing user experiences.

Which tools are most suitable for leaders in that regard?

Tools like machine learning algorithms, natural language processing, and data analytics platforms are most suitable for leaders effectively leveraging AI.

What skills must a leader possess to successfully use AI?

My wife (who, by the way, will be presenting at the next MDI Leadership Horizon) and I playfully interpret the “GPT” in ChatGPT as “Genius Partner For Thinking.” In that regard, leaders can use AI to map the various decisions and consequences. They can use it to synthesize complex ideas. They can use it for creating briefs.

It helps to think of AI as a droid (like C-3PO from Star Wars) without a body (for now). But to successfully use AI, leaders need skills such as data literacy to understand AI-generated insights, critical thinking to interpret AI recommendations, and emotional intelligence to manage teams effectively.

And discipline to use regularly, communication to get the most, creativity to imagine solutions, and humility to recognize their limitations.

What technical skills are necessary?

While skills like basic programming and data analysis can be beneficial, the good news is that leaders can be something other than technical experts.

But they should nevertheless have a fundamental understanding of AI concepts. Specifically, at this game stage, they should become adept at prompt design and engineering.

Artificial intelligence technologies are evolving rapidly. How can companies ensure that they keep up with all the latest developments and make their AI strategy successful in the long run?

To stay current, companies should invest in continuous learning and development programs for their employees. This effort includes staying abreast of industry trends (via news, reading, conferences, etc.), training on AI technologies, and ethical considerations.

Establishing cross-functional AI teams and fostering collaboration between IT and business departments can also ensure a successful long-term AI strategy. And I think it’s also helpful to have fun with technology—play with it, challenge each other to push the limits of their creativity, and ultimately try to improve people’s lives and the planet’s health.

Before undertaking any new AI initiative, ask, “How could this support life?”

ai's developments

How realistic is it that a portion of our leaders in the future will consist of robots?

While AI systems may assist in decision-making, it’s unlikely that robots will entirely replace human leaders. True leadership involves empathy, intuition, and understanding complex human dynamics, which are difficult for AI to replicate.

With that said, it’s realistic that we’ll see the widespread assistance of human leaders by robots. And this includes, further down our timeline, the physical augmentation of humans.

What would such a leadership style look like? One that is solely based on Artificial Intelligence?

Here, we can get quite philosophical about what it means to be a human leader. After all, successful leadership is transmitted. And this presupposes that something is learned, taught, and replicated. Therefore, if humans can do it—and it’s measurable, repeatable, and scalable—then it’s not out of the realm of possibility that AI could do it.

A purely AI leader, I think, would make decisions faster, it would hold larger amounts of data and scenarios, and even perhaps make better decisions insofar as the criteria have been established to support life (for people and the planet).

But it would require bravery from humans to default to AI to lead them, to cast aside our anthropocentric worldview, and embrace AI as a new species—A wild notion for a species that has historically had a hard time accepting people with other intersectionalities as their own!

But back to the original question: leadership style solely based on AI would lack the emotional intelligence, creativity, and adaptability that human leaders bring.

What do you see as the advantages and disadvantages in this scenario?

AI can excel in data-driven decision-making, efficiency, and objectivity. Ultimately, it would excel in sheer computational output and productivity—we could accelerate scenarios, projects, and tasks to their logical conclusions.

However, it may lack creativity, ethics, and the ability to understand the nuances of human behavior and emotions. A misstep here could accelerate consequences not in the best interest of supporting life.

What aspects can be taken over by Artificial Intelligence, and what should remain human?

AI should take over anything routine that can be done better, faster, or cheaper. But the caveat should be that surplus gains from labor should be used to offset losses incurred by humans.

This process could be achieved through such initiatives as universal basic income, subsidized upskilling and reskilling, and robust social welfare programs, to name a few. While decisions related to strategy, ethics, and employee well-being should remain human-driven.

At the same time, we need to start thinking ahead of the time when AI will gain sentience, at this point, we’ll have to be careful about thinking it as a tool.

AI in company use

Now that we’ve talked so much about artificial intelligence – what specific initial steps can companies/leaders take?

Start with small, manageable AI projects that solve specific problems. Start playing with the technology, use it more frequently, empower others to do so, and involve the entire organization in this endeavor.

Invest in employee training and AI literacy. Develop clear AI ethics guidelines to ensure responsible AI use. And encourage a culture of experimentation and learning.

How can we gradually integrate AI into our daily work routine?

To bring AI into your daily work routine, pick tasks that could use digital help. Ensure you’ve got the right data at your fingertips, and then find some AI tools that make sense for your goals.

Get your team on board by giving them a crash course in AI, so they’re on the same page. Test the waters with small pilot projects, tweaking things as you go along. Encourage everyone to work hand-in-hand with AI, where people bring the human touch, and AI brings the data smarts.

And don’t forget the ethics—set some clear rules for how AI should behave. If it all works out, consider rolling it out to more parts of your organization. Keep an eye on things, gather feedback, and ensure everyone’s still on board. Create a culture where AI is just another team member, with leaders who’ve got its back.

I have one last question that we will ask all our guests. What do you see as the biggest challenge for leaders in the next 5 years?

This is an excellent question to end with which to end our interview. I’m excited to revisit my answer in a year, as it might require substantial updating, given the exponential growth of the technology.

For now, one of the biggest challenges for leaders in the next five years will be navigating the evolving landscape of technology, AI, and sustainability while focusing on human well-being, planetary well-being, and ethical practices. Balancing these priorities will require adaptability, compassion, and visionary leadership.

It will require transcending our humans’ hardwired fear of change and a coordinated orientation toward using leadership to serve the greatest good: life.

Hamza Khan

Hamza Khan

Keynote Speaker

Hamza Khan is a best-selling author, award-winning entrepreneur, and globally-renowned keynote speaker whose TEDx talk “Stop Managing, Start Leading” has been viewed over two million times.

The world’s leading organizations trust him to enhance modern leadership, inspire purposeful productivity, nurture lasting resilience, and navigate constant change.

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One Size Fits None: An Appeal for Better Leaders

One Size Fits None: An Appeal for Better Leaders

by Hamza Khan | Feb 27, 2023 | International leadership development, Leadership Impact, Leadership Tips | 0 comments

One Size Fits None: An Appeal for Better Leaders

According to Deloitte University Press, 86% of companies have identified developing new leaders as an “urgent” need. And upon closer inspection, it’s clear to see why. 

Incompetency as a Norm

When it comes to managers’ performance, alarmingly, the norm seems to be incompetence. In a recent study, Gallup found that companies fail to choose suitable candidates for management roles a staggering 82% of the time. Now to be fair, there are not many qualified potential people to choose from in the first place.

In another report, Gallup revealed that only 1 in 10 people possess requisite management talents, such as the ability to build relationships that create trust, open dialogue, and full transparency. And of those who do end up becoming managers, their talent is seldom nurtured. 

A survey by Career Builders found that a whopping 58% of managers receive little-to-no management training. Alas, most bosses aren’t necessarily good at making the people around them better. And how this plays out in workplaces across the planet is disheartening.

For instance, a Harvard Business Review study uncovered that 58% of people trust strangers more than their bosses. So arguably, they are more willing to let their children get into an Uber driven by a complete stranger than they are to let them work with their boss. In light of these findings, it’s no surprise that most employees—upwards of 80% according to some of the most comprehensive studies—are disengaged, looking for other jobs, and ditching traditional employment to pursue entrepreneurship. 

Who is your Leadership Inspiration?

As it happens, the modern workplace is overrun by bosses who aren’t qualified to lead. Reflect on your career for a moment by thinking about the best boss you worked for, as well as the worst boss you worked for. Once you’ve visualized them, ask yourself: whose leadership style do you strive to emulate?

If you picked the best boss you worked for, then you have an innate understanding of the complex problem at hand, as well as its embarrassingly simple solution.

On one side, it’s heartening to see organizations worldwide upgrade from simple Corporate Social Responsibility commitments to more holistic and comprehensive Environmental, Social, and Governance commitments, as well as aspire to B-Corp status.

Glimpses of a positive-sum thriving future are visible through the cracks of the prevailing zero-sum failing system. A full year before we plunged into the chaos of the COVID-19 pandemic, Marc Benioff, CEO of Salesforce, made this urgent appeal to his contemporaries at the 2019 Business Roundtable Forum: 

“The purpose of business now transcends shareholders. We need a reinvented system focused on employees, customers, communities, and the planet.”  

Leadership Inspiration

Meaningful Leadership

Benioff believes that companies should use their power to advance meaningful causes. And chief among them is the fight against climate change. In doing so, he joins a small but rising list of industry captains—including Patagonia Founder Yves Chouinard, who made headlines for relinquishing his entire stake in the company to fight climate change—who speak up about the necessary structural changes required to stand a chance against the world’s most pressing issue.

So on one side, it seems that leaders have their hearts in the right places as far as environmental sustainability is concerned. But on the other, a peculiar problem is intensifying: organizations are living shorter and shorter lives. Consider that in 1958, the average age of an S&P 500 company was a healthy 61 years. But in 2023, that number is down to a mere 18 years.

In fact, McKinsey calculates that most S&P 500 companies will disappear by 2027. I suspect that this rate of decay has a lot to do with the aforementioned issue of bad bosses. As I wrote about extensively in my pandemic-inspired book, “Leadership, Reinvented,” during times of change and crises, people don’t “step up”—they actually “fall back” and “sink” to the level of their values, training, and preparation. 

Given that most managers are incompetent and that our world is becoming increasingly volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous, the problem becomes clearer: overwhelmed and incompetent bosses are reverting to and doubling down on a counterproductive style of management—a remnant of the early Industrial Revolutions, known in the leadership literature as “Dominance.” 

Dominance-Oriented Leadership

Dominance-oriented leadership it’s a one-size-fits-all style of management which relies on force and intimidation to induce fear. Below are common traits of this leadership style:

  1. Assertive
  2. Highly Directive
  3. Top-Down
  4. Traditional
  5. Command-And-Control
  6. Hierarchical 
  7. Coercive
  8. Intimidating
  9. Punitive
  10. Authoritative

Dominance-oriented leaders are inclined to enjoy giving orders, intimidating subordinates, overly relying on reward and punishment, and prioritizing the organization’s needs over those it employs. The one critical problem with this management style is that it doesn’t replicate.

And so, in the truest sense of the word, it’s an unsustainable approach to managing. After all, think back to the bad boss you visualized earlier—you’re actively choosing not to replicate their management style.



Dominance-oriented leadership

Caught up in Dominance cycles, most companies—whether on the S&P 500 or FTSE Eurofirst 300—haven’t committed to comprehensive measures to fight climate change, such as running net zero carbon operations. Staring into the abyss of time, afraid, the managers of these companies are making the grave mistake of prioritizing greater profits.

All the while, they’re exacerbating the very problem that will upend their business. Intimidation can beget compliance, but relationships based on Dominance are less stable. Getting out of unstable survival mode involves looking to the opposite approach to Dominance, namely, Prestige. 

Prestige-Oriented Leadership

This style of management involves the sharing of expertise or know-how to gain respect. Prestige-oriented leaders are servant leaders who care about relationships with their team, avoid intimidation and coercion, strive to be role models, use soft power to influence subordinates, and create more organizational leaders. Below are common traits of this leadership style:

  1. Transformational 
  2. Humble
  3. Non-Directive
  4. Empowering
  5. Egalitarian
  6. Inspiring
  7. Generous
  8. Admired
  9. Supportive
  10. Authentic

Benefits of Prestige-Oriented Leadership

Compared to Dominance, Prestige is more tedious to manifest, for it requires substantial tailoring to the needs of individuals. But the caveat is that of the two, Prestige is the only style that is widely and willingly replicated. In this way, it’s the only sustainable option. But putting aside the question of ease, Prestige is actually better for business.

A ten-year examination of stock market returns for the 20 best-ranked public companies on Glassdoor reveals that 60% have beaten the S&P 500, and 91% have had positive returns. And behold, Fortune’s Top 100 best companies to work at also outperformed the S&P 500 over the past decade. The top company, Adobe, beat the market by 9.5% each year and returned 1762% during this time.

And according to the American College of Occupational and Environmental Medicine, companies that promote a culture of health, safety, and well-being also outperformed the market by 2% per year, with a weighted return on equity of 264% (compared with the S&P 500 return of 243%). It turns out that exceptional places to work create outstanding returns for their shareholders. So while Prestige may be a more challenging path to the top, it’s absolutely worth doing.



Prestige-Oriented Leadership

Dominance or Prestige?

Are there situations where a Dominance-oriented leader performs better than a Prestige-oriented leader? Yes. A top-down, dominant approach can be efficient when a solid plan is in place, and a highly coordinated, unified effort is needed to deliver it.

A dominant leader can make each part of a company adhere to clearly defined actions, and can save time through quick and firm decision-making. But all this assumes that there is a healthy relationship between managers and employees, and that good communication and buy-in have taken place.

Which, as we know, is simply not the case in the modern workplace. One way to rethink the Prestige-Dominance dichotomy is as a permission-based blend—the privilege of successful Prestige orientation is the earned ability to switch to Dominance as the needs of the organization and its people change. 

For Human Resources and Learning & Development professionals, the business case is clear. And it needs to be communicated to managers across the organization—potential managers, newly minted managers, and C-Suite alike: lead with Prestige. Early in my career, a mentor advised me that a leader’s true purpose is to “develop new leaders.”

A coordinated contingent of Prestige-oriented leaders is critical to navigating our world away from impending environmental catastrophe and toward a sustainable positive-sum future. And this global effort depends on every organization’s ability to develop new leaders. 

Hamza Khan

Hamza Khan

Keynote Speaker

Hamza Khan is a best-selling author, award-winning entrepreneur, and globally-renowned keynote speaker whose TEDx talk “Stop Managing, Start Leading” has been viewed over two million times.

The world’s leading organizations trust him to enhance modern leadership, inspire purposeful productivity, nurture lasting resilience, and navigate constant change.

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